Sending an Email: Why You Need an Editor

Version 5 of Microsoft’s Style for Technical Communications, which came out in June 2010, changed the company’s style of hyphenating e-mail and writing Web site as two words, capitalizing Web. Henceforth in Microsoft communications, email (a noun, still never a verb) will have no hyphen. Web will now be lowercase, “except when referring to a UI element or feature name, such as Web Slice, or in the phrase World Wide Web.” Website and webpage have become one word, but all other two-word web terms remain as two words.

A Microsoft memo explained; “We’re making this change to Microsoft style to improve consistency across Microsoft content and to align with the evolution of these terms in technological and general usage.” The memo also noted, “Dropping the hyphen from email is a style decision particular to this word. Other e-words, such as e-commerce, will keep their hyphens, and all other words with hyphens will continue to be hyphenated. However, avoid e-words when you can use words without the prefix, and don’t coin new e-words. For example, use commerce and mail rather than e-commerce and email when the context is clear.”

What’s important here is not what policies Microsoft adopts, but that Microsoft is yet another powerful and accepted authority in the field of grammar, style and usage–one of many, in fact. So many well-argued interpretations are on the Internet today that many traditional rules on grammar and spelling are becoming more arbitrary than absolute.

Certainly, in many cases there can be more than one way (or should it be over one way?) to be correct. However, there is only one way to be consistent. Companies, organizations and individuals should set their own style guides for words and phrases common to their communications, and then stick to them. Another pair of eyeballs can never hurt in accomplishing that goal. Hire an editor.

Bob Sheppard’s Legacy: Clear, Concise, Correct

I have never been a fan of the New York Yankees, but I’ve never been a Yankee hater, either. After all, both sides of my family lived in the Bronx, just a few stops up the Jerome Avenue el from Yankee Stadium. Although my family lived there until I reached in kindergarten, my first team was the Giants, probably because the first player I idolized was Giants Hall of Fame centerfielder Willie Mays. But my beloved Giants and the despised Dodgers deserted New York for the West Coast after the 1956 season, and the Yankees were the only team in town until the Mets arrived in 1962. The Mets became my favorite team, but since I  grew up in one of the Yankees’ golden eras (unfortunately, there have been too many), I had to admire the Yankees, their lore and their continued excellence.

Bob Sheppard Day at Yankee Stadium, 2008. (AP Photo)

Their tradition extended off the field. One of my earliest and most vivid memories of the first Yankee Stadium is what it sounded like. Not just the roar of the crowd after a homer from Moose Skowron, Yogi or the Mick, but the sonorous elocution of  public address announcer Bob Sheppard as he welcomed them to Yankee Stadium, read the starting lineups and introduced each player as he came to bat. Each position, name and number, each and every syllable, perfectly pronounced, echoed around the park.

“Now batting for the Yankees, playing center field, No. 7, Mickey Mantle.  No. 7.”

In the news coverage and many tributes following his July 11 death, the 99-year-old St. John’s University linguistics professor Sheppard was remembered as “the voice of God” (attributed to Reggie Jackson) for his work with the Yankees, the New York Giants NFL team and St. John’s. Shepperd himself, in an interview rebroadcast on ESPN, called attention not to his voice, but to the words he spoke. In contrast to the bombastic home-team enthusiasts who rule the P.A. system at most U.S. stadia and arenas today (“EEE-CHEE-RO SOO-ZOO-KEY!!!”), Shepperd said he wanted all his announcements to include three key elements: Be clear, concise and correct. He consistently delivered the same information, always impeccably, from his first Yankee game in 1951 to his last in 2007. (He also read the starting lineups for the last game played in the old Yankee Stadium on Sept. 21, 2008.)

“Now batting for the Yankees, the shortstop, No. 2, Derek Jeter.  No. 2.”

Clear, concise, correct. Not only are those three words a well chosen standard for player introductions at Yankee Stadium, but it’s also a grand trio to govern all written and verbal communication. Whether you deliver your message in a press release, an e-mail alert, an ad, a personal letter or all of them and more, making your copy clear, concise and correct is always the right place to start. If your words need some fine-tuning for discriminating audiences, a professional editor can help. 

Finding the Right Words: An Editor Can Make a Difference

When this is the first e-mail I read in the morning, I know I still have a place in this world.

“Can you take a look at this and make sure our grammer and messages flow correctly?”

If the clients can’t spell grammar, can they possibly have a clue how to use it properly?

Tools of the trade.

In a world that wants to communicate in 140-character snippets, perhaps only snooty English teachers and persnickety editors still care about grammar and spelling. Certainly not a day goes by that I don’t see examples of bad grammar, misspellings and incorrect choice of words in published articles or ads in print and on the Internet. Only the perpetrators know whether the mistakes can be blamed on ignorance or carelessness.

From the Tacoma News-Tribune Mariners Insider Blog: “The Seattle Mariners had a fine season, though a few ex-patriots are having better ones – and unless the Minnesota Twins win the World Series, some former Mariner is going home with a ring.” (As far as I know, all ex-Patriots played in the National Football League. Expatriates would be the correct word here.)

From the Magnolia-Queen Anne News: “When he’s not hanging out with his wife, and daughter, Beaudoin can be found in his office in Fremont and sometimes tapping his next tomb at the Magnolia Tullys.” First, ditch the unnecessary comma between wife and daughter. Then the problem with spell check surfaces: It’s probably just a typo, but “tomb” is spelled correctly nonetheless. Unless this author is chiseling his own tombstone while sipping his latte, “tome” would be a more likely candidate.

Changing rolls in the Mariners bullpen?

A Seattle Times sports section headline: “League, Kelley fill Lowe’s roll.” What kind of filling did the two relief pitchers provide–grand salami and high cheese, perhaps? (At least the first paragraph under the headline used the word role correctly.)

One of my own pet peeves has been the choice between “over” and “more than.” In American newspapers, where I learned my grammar, the Associated Press Stylebook said that “over” denotes a spatial relationship (I hold my hand over the desk), while “more than” and “fewer than” (or “less than,” but that’s another topic altogether) are used in a numerical relationship (his salary increased more than 12 percent).

In the world at large, however, the choice is not so clear. While the Associated Press Stylebook states, “More than is preferred with numerals,” The Chicago Manual of Style says “As an equivalent of more than, [over] is perfectly good idiomatic English.” Three grammar blogs (Grammar Girl, Business Writing and The Writer’s Bag) have three different opinions. The long and short of it: Go with common sense and what sounds right.

Look at this recent article from The New York Times. The headline: “Over 14 Years, an American Inmate and Peru Itself Found Ways to Transform.” The article begins, “When Lori Berenson was jailed in Peru on terrorism charges over 14 years ago, she was a fiery young leftist from New York.” Clearly, “over” is the right word in the headline. But in the first sentence of the article, the choice is not as cut and dried. “More than” to me sounds clearer, more dignified. It fits the sentence and the publication better. “Over” isn’t wrong, just not as good.

In your own writing, choosing the right words in each particular situation can make a difference in how your message is perceived. Making those decisions may require the expertise and feel of an experienced editor.

Learn to Write: To Write Well, Start with a Plan

Writing shouldn’t be hard. All you need is a plan.

So whether you’re writing a letter, a resume, a memo, a report, a news release, a feature article, an ad, or even a book, consider two things before you start:

   • What do I want this document to accomplish?

   • Who is its audience?

Your answers will determine the content, style, length, tone and language of your document. Now comes the hard part: the writing.

Good writing accomplishes what it sets out to do and communicates effectively with its audience.

How does that happen?

1. Write like you talk. Keep sentences short, varying sentence length for rhythm and effect. Use punctuation to control the flow of your words.
2. Make an outline, or at least a list of the points you want to make. Prioritize it.
3. Always be grammatically correct, and don’t send people scurrying for their dictionaries (they won’t bother, so they really won’t know exactly what you mean).
4. Get to the point–fast. Readers value conciseness above all. They have other things to do.
5. Be authoritative. Avoid passive voice (it’s longer and less direct). Sound like you mean it.

If you start by answering the first two questions above and follow through on the last five points, your writing will mark you as a professional and get the results you need.
When you don’t have the time–or patience–to write well yourself, a skilled editor can help you communicate effectively and get the job done. Please contact me.

How to Be Your Own Editor

Sometimes I (jokingly) tell my business clients that they don’t really need to hire a professional editor. And they wouldn’t–as long as they did these six things:

1. Declare a Designated Proofreader and Grand Poobah of Writing for your office. It can be you, but it’s even more effective if it’s someone else–especially if that someone is careful and likes to read. Make that person your document QA (quality assurance) specialist.
2. Get a dictionary. I’d recommend Webster’s New World College Dictionary (Fourth Edition), the accepted standard throughout journalism. Get a discounted price on Amazon.com by buying the accompanying Roget’s A-Z Thesaurus at the same time.
3. Get an Associated Press Stylebook. It provides logical, easy-to-look up rules for capitalization, abbreviation and more. It’s now available online and on phone applications, but keeping a printed copy in the office bookcase is a good idea.
4. Get The Elements of Style by Strunk and White. This thin, breezily written volume resolves 99 percent of the grammar issues you’ll ever come across, plus the best advice on writing I’ve ever gotten: Omit needless words.
5. Develop a style guide of your own. Just open a Word document and make entries when you think of it regarding how you want to spell and punctuate terms at your company. Be sure to list them alphabetically so they can be retrieved easily, and your company style guide will gradually evolve. Circulate it periodically, so everybody in the organization knows the rules.
6. Don’t just guess–look it up! Use these tools whenever you prepare a document, and your writing will communicate better and look sharper. And don’t ever trust a computer program to perform an accurate spelling or grammar check.

Realize, of course, that while everybody in your organization may know that rules on grammar and style exist, only the Designated Proofreader and Grand Poobah of Writing will actually try to follow them and care when others do not. That’s why this person is so essential to your company’s internal and external communications.

If you don’t have one–or the time to do it right yourself–well, maybe you need an editor after all. Here’s one who can help you.

Proofreading, Anyone?

In their second game of the new baseball season, San Francisco Giants outfielder Eugenio Velez wore a  jersey that read “San Francicso.” According to The Associated Press, no one noticed until after the Giants’ 10-4 win over the Astros. Interestingly, the AP story quoted  the Dominican outfielder saying “Incredible!” in Spanish. Except the AP version left out the “i” in incredible.

Another set

...of eyes can be helpful.

I had just finished reading that story in The Seattle Times when I turned my attention to a slick, expensively produced pamphlet published by Animal Health division of Novartis, one of the biggest pharaceutical companies in the world. And yet in its section on training, it refers to “methods based on punitive principals.” (Principles would be the correct word here.)

Doesn’t anybody bother to proofread anymore? A second pair of educated eyes can spare a lot of embarrassment later. Better get an editor.

Need an Editor? Try This Short Quiz

What’s wrong in the following paragraph?

The hotel manager ordered the house-keeping staff to dust the mantle above the fireplace in the lobby, but that does not infer the staff was doing a poor job. He also complemented their overall effort and it’s positive affect on the hotels business.

If you thought that paragraph looked fine…well, you might need an editor.

The meaning of those two sentences comes across, more or less. But the paragraph actually includes seven common errors in grammar, punctuation, capitalization, and spelling (look below to see what they are). Many people won’t even notice them. But if these were your words, these little mistakes could add up and make a reader think that you don’t pay enough attention to detail–or worse. That’s not the high degree of professionalism you want to project.

Good writing makes the best and longest-lasting impression, because printed words tend to stick around. Your customers and staff will look at the communications that you put in front of them again and again. Therefore, always make sure that you are communicating professionally and effectively. Your writing should read smart, look sharp, and put your best words forward.

An editor can help with that. Another set of eyes can sharpen and direct your language, improve its flow, increase its focus, and make it consistent from page to page in multiple presentations and platforms. An editor spots the holes in your writing, anticipates the questions it will generate, and makes your message more effective. As Supreme Court Justice Louis D. Brandeis said, “There is no great writing, only great rewriting.”

It's tough work, but somebody's gotta do it.

But do you, personally, need an editor for your writing? How many mistakes did you find in the paragraph above? “I cannot think of anybody who doesn’t need an editor,” Nobel Prize-winning novelist Toni Morrison said, “even though some people claim they don’t.”

The mistakes in that italicized paragraph are listed below. If you missed some of them, contact a professional editor .

1. “housekeeping” should not be hyphenated; it is one word
2. A “mantel” is a shelf over the fireplace; a “mantle” is a shroud or cloak, or something that covers
3. “infer” is incorrect in this usage; the correct word in this case is “imply”
4. “complemented” means “completed; ”complimented” means praised
5. “it’s” is a contraction for it is; this should be “its” (with no apostrophe), a possessive pronoun replacing “effort”
6. “affect” is a verb; the correct word is “effect,” which is a noun
7. “hotels” is a plural; in this case, its use is possessive, so there should be an apostrophe (“hotel’s”)

Copy Editing: A Dying Art (Part II)

The impending death of copy editing is more imminent than I thought. Thanks to my friend and colleague Alan Stamm, here is an alarming certifcation from the blog of writer-cartoonist Steve Greenberg:

“Copy editors are the kidneys of the paper, filtering out the waste products and toxins of errors, inconsistencies and misspellings. They question reporters’ statements, correct the grammar and write the headlines that prompt readers to look at the stories they edit. And they are rapidly being eliminated. “[http://blog.cagle.com/greenberg/ ]

Greenberg’s post goes on to describe plans of the Scripps newspaper chain to consolidate all of its copy editing and layout in one location in Texas. “What does this mean to the newspapers?” he writes. “It means there won’t be local people to catch local place names, history or other regional idiosyncrasies that good local copy editors can catch, nor any real ‘institutional memory’ of local people and institutions.

“For example, at the Kitsap Sun in Bremerton, Wash., will they be able to sort out all those odd Native American names? Will they know you don’t board a Vashon Island ferry to Tacoma but rather to ‘Point Defiance,’ or that Vashon Island and Maury Island are actually solidly connected?”

Yikes! Former managing editor Stamm will no doubt remember when our beloved employer, the Syracuse New Times, tried to run the Ithaca New Times and Buffalo New Times in a similar manner in the early 1970s. It didn’t work, of course, but at least we had an excuse: We were young, naive, and stupid. The Scripps plan is not likely to function any better in 2010, and it’s far more onerous. The Scripps papers, and those of other chains, are still alleged to be the reliable sources of their respective communities.

So much for that idea.

Child Care Center Gets Press Coverage

I’ve gotten a great deal of personal satisfaction out of my ongoing professional relationship with Paula Jones, owner and founder of Our Beginning Child Care & Early Learning in Seattle. Paula first contacted me several years ago for help with her resumé and other documents related to a job search. She didn’t get that job, but a year or so later was calling again, this time to help her formulate a business plan to get financing for a child care center–a high-quality specialized facility that took a holistic approach to child care, early learning and parenting skills. It didn’t take her long to convince me she had a winning concept and the expertise to make it happen. Ultimately, all the lenders, certifiers, and realtors agreed, and about two years later, Our Beginning opened in Seattle’s Fremont neighborhood.

The opening triggered another wave of activity for me. There was Web site copy to be edited, as well as job descriptions, hiring practices, and employee policies. And press releases, of course, heralding the grand opening and the unique philosophies behind the facility.

I thought the media would respond to Paula’s presentation, and early results indicate I’m right. KING5-TV and the Ballard News-Tribune responded, and more will no doubt follow. Congratulations to Paula for getting the attention she and Our Beginning deserve. With the dearth of quality child care facilities in the Seattle area, the center should be running at full capacity quickly. I look forward to doing many more projects with Paula and her associates in the future.

Copy Editing: A Dying Art?

I’ve noticed the decline in copy-editing sharpness in my hometown Seattle Times, where the newsroom has been slashed severely in the past two years. The same thing is happening at newspapers everywhere.

Washington Post ombudsman Andrew Alexander noted in a January column that the newspaper was getting more complaints from “readers who complain that increased copy-editing errors have become annoying and are damaging The Post’s credibility.”

“If they don’t care about basics like grammar and spelling, how much do they care about factual accuracy?” one reader asked “For me, the errors have become like fingernails on a blackboard,” e-mailed another.

Alexander’s column also noted the increased use of software programs that detect spelling, grammar and punctuation errors, and words that can have dual meanings. Future programs are emerging, he writes, that can be customized to reflect style preferences of individual newspapers.

But Roy Peter Clark, a senior scholar at the Poynter Institute on media studies in Florida, warns against overreliance on technology. There’s danger in “treating it as something godlike that descends out of the machine and corrects all your mistakes for you.” Clark said.

Hopefully, no software will ever be able to replace a fastidious editor. So if you need one,  click on mikegreenstein.com.